One By One

On October 24, 2010 we had a Stake Visiting Teaching Conference.  It was more of fireside.  My 2nd counselor Cassie Myer gave a short introduction to our theme "One by One."  My 1st counselor, Cherie Peterson spoke about an example of visiting teachers that made a dramatic change in her life.  We watched the church produced video, "A Visiting Teacher. . .".  Two ward presidents, Josalyn Mecham and McKenzie Walton, told about things they were doing in their wards to help the girls be successful visiting teachers.  We had a musical number entitled, "One by One" sung by Emily Peet, Eliza Clark and Tennille Walker.  My secretary Marjorie Miller gave a short talk and then I was the "main" speaker. After I spoke, President Richard Heaton, 1st counselor in the stake presidency bore his testimony and gave some good thoughts on visiting teaching.   It sounds like a full program, but everything was pretty short and I don't think we were over an hour.  

I have been serving in this capacity for about a year now.  I have been so impressed with you sisters.  You have taught me so much about serving and learning and growing in the gospel of Jesus Christ.  This Relief Society organization is one of a kind in the world today.  What an honor it is to be part of it.  The purpose of Relief Society is to increase personal faith and righteousness, to strengthen homes and families, and to serve the Lord and His children.  Coming to Sunday Relief Society meetings is only a part of this organization.  Visiting Teaching is probably one of the most important aspects of Relief Society.  If visiting teaching functioned the way the Lord wanted it to, we wouldn’t have to worry about any of you sisters.  All of you would be well taken care of.  Our theme for tonight has been “One by One.” 

            Visiting teaching is looking after the sisters in each ward on an individual basis.  It’s teaching, serving, loving, enjoying, and strengthening every sister one by one, just as Jesus Christ served and taught others one by one.  He loves us today on an individual basis. I don’t know if I understand how the Lord can know and love every one of you, but I know He does and He needs each of us to help Him show His love by being visiting teachers. 

There is no calling more important then the calling of visiting teacher.  You heard what Sister Beck said, "A sister in this Church has no other responsibility outside of her family that has the potential to do as much good as visiting teaching."  If our families are our number one priority, then visiting teaching must be number 2.   I have heard my own daughters say, “ I just don’t get visiting teaching.  I don’t like it.  It’s awkward, etc. etc. etc.”  I’m sure there are some of you out there tonight that feel the same way or have roommates that feel this way.  And I have to say, when you view visiting teaching as a way of life and not as a task, than you will love visiting teaching.  It is a great opportunity for you to get to know another woman on an individual basis.  It’s a great time to build friendships.  And it is a way you can serve endlessly. Visiting teaching can help strengthen the testimony of your neighbor, and it can strengthen yours as well.

Julie B. Beck, Nov. 2009 Ensign, “Visiting teaching becomes the Lord’s work when our focus is on people rather than percentages. In reality, visiting teaching is never finished. It is more a way of life than a task. Faithfully serving as a visiting teacher is evidence of our discipleship. We demonstrate our faith and follow a pattern established by the Lord as we report on our assignment every month.”

Visiting Teaching is a great opportunity to serve.  It’s one way that Heavenly Father has given us to make serving easier.  It’s all set up for you.  You just have to carry it out.  Russell M. Ballard, May 2004 “I believe our Heavenly Father’s everlasting purpose for His children is generally achieved by the small and simple things we do for one another.”  Visiting Teaching doesn’t have to be a big deal.  It can be something simple and small and when it is consistent and continual, it will make a huge difference is the life of all involved.  We heard one such example from Sister Peterson tonight.

We’ve heard how the Lord served people individually.  He is our perfect example.  I loved the video where we saw many visiting teachers in action.  Only a couple of those pictures showed 2 sisters preparing to give a formal message to a third sister.  While this is a very important part of visiting teaching, it doesn’t always have to look that way.  Sister Beck said, “If our watch care were primarily about reporting that every sister in the ward heard the Visiting Teaching Message printed each month in the Ensign and Liahona, it would be much more efficient to read it aloud to everyone in a sacrament meeting.”  I have heard Sister Beck and Sister Thompson both tell the story of 2 visiting teachers who went to the home of a sister they visit taught and were intent on giving her a message.  Her husband had just had surgery.  The sister was stressed as her toddlers were making a mess in the kitchen as they tried to prepare themselves something to eat.  The father, who was just coming out of anesthesia, was trying to comfort a crying baby who needed some attention and a diaper changed.  And here these 2 sisters sat with this young mother in the front room, diligently giving her a spiritual message.  What this sister needed at that moment was probably not a spoken message, but a hand in helping take care of hungry children, an injured husband and a crying baby.  Maybe what she needed was someone to bring her a meal or someone to clean up the kitchen.

So if Visiting Teaching isn’t just or only giving a message, than what is it?  Have you ever thought about calling the sister you visit teach when you are going out for ice cream with your roommates and invite her to come with you?  Have you ever thought about taking dinner to your sister when you know she is knee deep in homework or studying for a big test?  How about calling up one of your sisters and seeing if she would like to come to a movie with you?  You could easily just drop off a couple of homemade cookies on your way to campus or when you stop by the eatery you can buy 2 brownies instead of just one for yourself.  Leave her a note on the windshield of her car or on her apartment door or better yet, have one of her roommates slip a note onto her pillow.  Or how about this, sit with her in Relief Society or Sunday School or even Sacrament Meeting—especially if she is sitting alone.  It can be as simple as praying for her every day.   You don’t have to do something every day.  We don’t want you to be overbearing or obnoxious!  But think about her and extend a warm hand.  Now, I am not a creative person, but in just a couple of minutes, I have come up with this simple list of ideas. There are countless things you can do.  Make your own list and get started.  See how much fun you can have trying to come up with unique ways to let your girls know you are thinking about them.  This is an opportunity to become true friends for life!!

Elder Ronald A. Rasband, Nov. 2000 Ensign, “Perhaps never in the history of mankind do we need to be serving on a one-by-one basis more than we do now.”    As we understand this great love that our Savior has for us, then we will want to share our love with others.  As we reach out and truly become friends with those we have been assigned to visit teach, we will not only serve them and minister to them but we will love them.  We will see the Relief Society motto come to life “Charity Never Faileth”.

May I end with a quote from Pres. Monson from the General Relief Society meeting in September.  “In a hundred small ways, all of you wear the mantle of charity. Life is perfect for none of us. . . .  may we have the pure love of Christ for our fellow travelers in this journey through life.  May we recognize that each one is doing her best to deal with the challenges which come her way, and may we strive to do our best to help out.....

Charity has been defined as “the highest, noblest, strongest kind of love,”12 the “pure love of Christ . . . ; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with [her].”13 .... “Charity never faileth.” May this long-enduring Relief Society motto, this timeless truth, guide you in everything you do.  May it permeate your very souls and find expression in all your thoughts and actions.”

I want to add my testimony that Jesus Christ loves us one by one.  He knows us each individually and wants us each to be watched over and taken care of.   Stop thinking of visiting teaching as a task that needs to be checked off.  Get to know your sisters and love them as Jesus does.  The Church needs you!! The sisters in your wards need you!  May you go out and serve your sisters one by one. 

Obey with EXACTNESS!

In October 2010 we started ward conferences.  I had prayed earnestly to know what the Lord would have us teach to each ward in the stake.  As I prayed the story of the army of Helaman came strongly to my mind.  I got out my scriptures and read the chapters that tell their story.  I didn't know at first what angle to take but after more study and prayer and counseling with my presidency the lesson came together.  After a couple of wards of trial and error and making many changes, we finally had Cassie Myer introduce the lesson by reviewing the story of the 2000 Stripling Warriors and how it relates to each of us.  Then I took over and finished the lesson.  I wish I had the way Cassie introduced it.  It  was perfect.  But non the less... here is my part.

I love the story of the army of Helaman (Alma 56-60). Sometimes people will ask, if you could meet anyone from the scriptures or in the past who would you want to meet?  And I’ve never really cared.  But after really studying about these 2000 stripling warriors, I think it would be amazing to meet them and feel of their countenance.   I’m sure you would be able to feel their spiritual strength, just by being in their presence.  As I thought about it, I thought about you young women and the amazing women which you are and thought, wouldn’t it be awesome to be like them?  And to have people say about you in 300 years,  

 (Alma 53:20-21) And they were all young women, and they were exceedingly valiant for ^acourage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all—they were women who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.

  21 Yea, they were women of truth and ^asoberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to ^bwalk uprightly before him.

I believe that you can all be such women.  We’ve talked about a couple of things that made these young men so valiant. I want to talk about one other character that they possessed. 

Read Alma 57:20-21, 58:40

These young men obeyed with exactness (vs. 21) and they kept the commandments continually (vs.40)

That’s pretty amazing!

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN TO YOU, to obey with exactness & continually?

        

·      No selective obedience

·      We must obey all the commandments—the hard and the easy—even the ones that challenge us. 

·      Doesn’t mean we are perfect at it, but we are continually trying and working at it.

These young men were fighting some pretty intense battles.  Yet they listened to their commander, Helaman, and did exactly what he told them.  It was not easy.  It took great effort, physically, mentally and I’m sure spiritually.

How do you obey with exactness?

            1. Commitment            2. Courage               3. Faith               4. Plan           

Alma 56:30 Now when we saw that the Lamanites began to grow uneasy on this wise, we were desirous to bring a stratagem into effect upon them;

They had a plan and they followed that plan.  You have to have a plan and you have to follow that plan.  Part of that plan may be general, like the 5 points of focus that Pres. Mullen has given us.  Part of your plan may relate strictly to what you need to work on.  That would help you overcome your weaknesses.  Follow that plan and you will succeed.

General Conference is full of things that our Heavenly Father wants us to do. It contains a great plan.

You are faced with some pretty intense battles.  We are blessed with prophets that understand what lies ahead.  You have a great Stake Presidency and wonderful Bishop who are also here to help you.

I started to make a list of the battles that you could face today.  It was discouraging so I stopped.  BUT, I realized one major thing.  That no matter what the problem was, I was able to find a solution.  There’s a great talk given by so and so at such and such conference.  There are scriptures that address everything in our lives.  And I realized again:  OUR HEAVENLY FATHER WANTS YOU TO RETURN—HE DOESN’T WANT ONE SOUL IN THIS ROOM TO BE LOST!

Jesus Christ loves you!  EVERYTHING HE DID WAS BECAUSE OF LOVE!

The prophet cares about you. 

Pres. Mullen is concerned with your well being.

I care about what you do with your life!

We must hold onto the iron rod with both hands and we must follow the words of the prophets.

Couple of quotes on obedience:

A young man who served as a missionary when Elder Neil Andersen was the mission president in France, had this to say about Elder Andersen, “He always raised our vision of the blessings the Lord desired for France. He taught about pure faith and obedience with exactness, and the Lord poured out His miracles upon us.”

Kevin Pearson said in the April 2009 General Conference, When we teach our children by example or precept to be casual or situational in obeying God’s commandments, we prevent them from receiving this vital spiritual gift of faith.  Faith requires an attitude of exact obedience, even in the small, simple things. . . . . As patterns of obedience develop, the specific blessings associated with obedience are realized and belief emerges.

Elder Robert D. Hales October 2010 conference:

“In our premortal state we chose to follow the Savior Jesus Christ! And because we did, we were allowed to come to earth. I testify that by making the same choice to follow the Savior now, while we are here on earth, we will obtain an even greater blessing in the eternities. But let it be known: we must continue to choose to follow the Savior. Eternity is at stake, and our wise use of agency and our actions are essential that we might have eternal life. . . . . Whenever we choose to come unto Christ, take His name upon us, and follow His servants, we progress along the path to eternal life.”

I love you and care about you.  Have courage and faith to face what lies ahead and to Obey God’s commandments with exactness and continually.

You are a daughter of God and He loves you!!  He wants you to return to Him.  He does not want one soul to be lost.

I have 3 areas of counsel and 1 challenge that I would like to leave with you today.

1.  Be careful how you use your time.  Don’t spend countless hours doing things that have no purpose.

At our regional conference in September, Sister Beck spoke briefly about this topic.  In my notes I recorded, “life passes while you’re staring at “that screen”.   “that screen” may be a television, or a computer, or an ipod or cell phone. I’m not saying, don’t watch TV or don’t use the computer.  We all need a little down time.  Just be careful.  And it’s not only technology that may be monopolizing our time.   I am saying, Don’t spend countless hours doing things that have no purpose.

2.  Stay away from Pornography and anything that resembles it.   Help your friends do the same.  Young Women don’t usually get this counsel, but I have felt impressed to say it to you today.

3.  Be careful in how you dress.  Elder Russell M Ballard said:

. . .understand that when you wear clothing that is too tight, too short, or too low cut, you not only can send the wrong message to young men with whom you associate, but you also perpetuate in your own minds the fallacy that a woman’s value is dependent solely upon her sensual appeal. This never has been nor will it ever be within the righteous definition of a faithful daughter of God.

Elder Dallin H. Oaks said in a talk on pornography in General Conference 2005, … young women, please understand that if you dress immodestly, you are magnifying this problem by becoming pornography to some of the men who see you.

I want to offer a challenge to you:

When you pull something out of your closet to wear, evaluate it.  Look at yourself in the mirror when you put it on.  Ask yourself:

·     Is it too low?  Too short?  Too tight? 

·     If you haven’t received your endowment yet, could you wear what you have on with temple garments? 

·     If you have temple garments, do you have to tuck your garments so they don’t show?

Is it too low?  Too short?  Too tight?    If it is then have the COURAGE to modify or throw it out.  Even if you love it to pieces.  With today’s fashions, you could easily put something underneath if it’s too low,  If it’s too short, you might be able to put on a pair of leggings.  Too tight??? I’m not sure there’s much hope for modification on that one.

         When you go to buy something new, ask yourself the same questions. 

Is it too low?  Too short?  Too tight?    

If it is, don’t buy it.  Even if it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen and you REALLY REALLY want it!! 

         Since starting ward conferences last fall, I have been very aware of my clothing.  I don’t usually have a problem.   But a few weeks ago, I put on a dress that I had only worn once.  It wasn’t too tight or too low but it was just a little short.  It really wasn’t TOO short, but I felt like if I bent over even a little, then it would be TOO short.  So I took it off and put it in my DI pile.  I didn’t want to do it.  But I decided I had to do it!

Dress in such a way that the young men won’t question your motives.  Even if your motives are completely innocent to begin with.  Prove it by how you dress.

It takes effort to get to the celestial kingdom.  It takes effort to obey with exactness.

It takes courage and faith and commitment.  But I know that you can be such young women, who are exceedingly valiant for courage and also for strength and activity.

Don’t get discouraged.  When you slip, grab the rod and hold on tighter.  Don’t let go.

I LOVE YOU!  I love my Heavenly Father.  I love Jesus Christ.  Heavenly Father wants you to win this battle and He doesn’t want one soul to be lost.  And I don’t either.    

WE ARE AS THE ARMY OF HELAMAN!

You are a Daughter of God!

          Each month we, as a presidency, have tried to send a message to each ward for all the girls.  In September of 2010 it was my turn to do the message.  A new semester had just begun.  This is the message that I sent.

        This past week I got to go to the Capitol Theater in Salt Lake and see the production of Lion King.  I loved the movie and the play was even better.  My favorite part is when Simba is in the jungle and he’s upset with his deceased father.  He says, “You said you’d always be there for me, but you’re not.” Rafiki comes and Simba asks him “Who are you?”  Rafiki responds by asking, “The question is, who are you?” of which Simba replies, “I thought I knew but now I’m not so sure.” Rafiki confirms what Simba has said.  He says, “You don’t even know who you are.  You’re Mufasa’s boy.” Rafiki leads him to a pond of water where Simba sees his own reflection.  As he looks at himself, Rafiki tells Simba that his father lives in him.  Mufasa’s voice comes to Simba, “You have forgotten me.  You have forgotten who you are, so have forgotten me.  Look inside yourself, Simba.  You are more than what you have become. . . .Remember who you are.  You are my son and the one true King.  Remember who you are.  Remember, Remember, Remember.”

            How many of us get so involved in our everyday lives, in our studies and socializing and in trying to find happiness, that we forget who we are.  Simba was the son of the King.  He was next in line to inherit ALL that his father had.  We too are children of a King, God, the Eternal Father.  We too have been promised that we can have all that our Father has.  It’s up to us whether or not we will acquire our inheritance.  As we remember who we are, Daughters of our Heavenly Father, we will want to live His commandments.  We will strive to become like his son Jesus Christ.  We will serve and help and reach out to all those around us who are struggling and need our help.  As we remember who we are, it will show in our countenances, in our actions, in all that we do.  I know that God loves us.  He loves you.  He wants you to be happy.  He wants you to return to Him someday.  He wants to give you all that He has.   Go forth with Faith and remember that you are a Daughter of God and can become more than what you are today.