Our Divine Purpose and Roles as Women in the Church

Before I was released I got to participate in many of the Ward Conferences in the Provo YSA 17th Stake. I love Ward Conferences.  They just seem to have such a strong spirit and you just feel motivated to do more and be better.  My presidency and I put together a lesson for each ward Relief Society.

One of my counselor's gave an introduction:  (at this point I don't have a copy of their intro.  I'm trying to get it.  check back because I will post it when I can.)

Then I concluded the lesson:

Challenge:  Make a goal of how you will take this lesson to be better than you are today.

Read pg. 3 1^st column 2^nd & 3^rd paragraph—(Daughters of my Kingdom)

 The Savior taught women in multitudes and as individuals, on the street and by the seashore, at the well and in their homes. He showed loving-kindness toward them and healed them and their family members. In many parables, He told stories of women engaged in ordinary activities. He demonstrated deep familiarity with women’s lives and drew timeless gospel lessons from their everyday experiences. He forgave them. He wept with them. He had compassion on them in their specific circumstances as daughters, wives, homemakers, mothers, and widows. He appreciated them and ennobled them.

Even in excruciating pain on the cross, the Savior expressed concern for His mother, who by then was very likely a widow in need of watchcare. And the first person to whom He appeared after His Resurrection was a woman.

I love this!  It makes me feel loved and special and important in the eyes of Jesus Christ, that I have a role and a purpose here on the earth.  I feel like Jesus Christ knows me.

Read (Daughters of my Kingdom) Pg. 7 1^st paragraph—

    

The women in the ancient Church were dignified and noble, needed and valued. They served others, increased in personal holiness, and participated in the great work of saving souls.

DIGNIFIED AND NOBLE -- NEEDED AND VALUED

You have a purpose here just as women in the past.  I believe you are dignified and noble.  You are needed and valued!  Esther understood her role and had the courage she needed to fulfill that purpose.  We need to find our own purpose. Just as the women in the ancient church we need to:

SERVE OTHERS

INCREASE IN PERSONAL HOLINESS

PARTICIPATE IN SAVING SOULS

Read (Daughters of my Kingdom) pg. 7 last paragraph:  As women participate in Relief Society, (we) serve as valiant disciples of Jesus Christ in the work of salvation. Like the women in the ancient Church, (we) work alongside men who hold the priesthood to increase faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and seek out and help those in need. Sister Julie B. Beck, the fifteenth Relief Society general president, taught: “Through Relief Society we practice being disciples of Christ. We learn what He would have us learn, we do what He would have us do, and we become what He would have us become.”

Write on Board: 

LEARN

DO

BECOME

The women of the ancient church are no different than today:  (as it says in this paragraph)  

We work alongside men, increase in faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and seek out and help those in need.

LEARN    (increase in personal righteousness) (work alongside men)

DO            (serve—seek out needy)        (participate in work of saving souls) (strengthen our families)

BECOME

        

You are on the playing field.  This is what you should be doing right now!!  The sign as you enter BYU says:                             Enter to Learn—Go forth to Serve

You are choice women, placed here on this earth “For such a time as this” just as Esther had a purpose and was placed “in the kingdom for such a times as hers.”

As members of the Church, as daughters of God, as women in the world, I’ve come up with 4 things that define your role:

1.  SERVE OTHERS: To seek out those in need--To be charitable—to serve and bless others—to help in bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of man!!!

One of the purposes of Relief Society: seek out and helping those in need!

By serving others we learn to be charitable.  We learn the pure love of Christ.

Sister Beck said, “Charity is more than a feeling of benevolence, and it’s more than virtuous living.  It is more than niceness.  It is living as Christ lived, and it is what we are to become.” 

I believe we start with these things and after a lifetime of practice we develop true charity.

The Prophet Joseph Smith said: “Don’t be limited in your views with regard to your neighbors’ virtues. … You must enlarge your souls toward others if you [would] do like Jesus. … As you increase in innocence and virtue, as you increase in goodness, let your hearts expand—let them be enlarged towards others—you must be longsuffering and bear with the faults and errors of mankind. How precious are the souls of men!”

President Monson teaches: “Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down. It is resisting the impulse to become offended easily. It is accepting weaknesses and shortcomings. It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others."1

With that said, I think it takes a lifetime to become truly charitable.

what can you do RIGHT NOW to serve and bless others?

            Example: Annie has been so kind to my daughter Abbie-invites her to activities—Abbie says no one talks to each other in her ward.  She asked me, "why is she so nice to me?"     

            Make cookies and share them with another apartment.

            Don’t judge others—accept them for who they are.

            Talk to others that you see outside of your apartment.

            Do your visiting teaching

            Fulfill your callings to the best you can

            Keep your eyes and ears and hearts always open to the needs of others

If you have a hard time being charitable, then I encourage you to pray for charity.  Like anything else, we have to have a desire.  Reading and studying your scriptures will soften your hearts and help you to have the desire to be charitable and help you to have charity—to be kind, caring, generous, patient, accepting, forgiving, inclusive, and selfless.

2. PARTICIPATE IN THE WORK OF SAVING SOULS: To be mothers—to nurture and teach God’s children

 Sister Beck said at the Women’s Conference @ BYU in May 2011, “The identity of a daughter of God is precious beyond compare and rich and full.  As guardians of hearth and home, women have responsibility for the hearts and souls of Heavenly Father’s children.  They are given this powerful and influential leadership role.  The female responsibility of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and friend … is all about nurturing, teaching, and influencing. These are non-negotiable responsibilities. We can’t delegate them. We can accept them and live them. These are things we understood before we were born, and we can’t negotiate with the Lord whether they’re part of His plan. These are our responsibilities.”

           

Even though, you are not mothers, you can still nurture and teach and influence God’s children.  You teach me and influence me in ways that you have no idea—and I am one of God’s children.

Now is the time to prepare to be a mother:

            Gain confidence in yourself

            Find out your strengths and your weaknesses—your likes and dislikes

            Strengthen your testimony-get in the habit of doing the 5 things that Pres. Mullen asks

            Be obedient & virtuous

            Take advantage of every opportunity to teach

            Visit Teach—be nurturing

As a mother, it is the greatest blessing that I have!!  It has brought me an indescribable amount of joy.

           

4.  To walk side by side with the Priesthood—receive gifts of the Spirit -- attributes of Jesus Christ

Read (Daughters in my Kingdoma) Lorenzo Snow said, pg. 7 bottom of 1^st column, To a group of Relief Society sisters, President Lorenzo Snow, the fifth President of the Church, said: “You have ever been found at the side of the Priesthood, ready to strengthen their hands and to do your part in helping to advance the interests of the kingdom of God; and as you have shared in these labors, so you will most certainly share in the triumph of the work and in the exaltation and glory which the Lord will give to His faithful children.”¹⁸

Just as Mary and Martha were vital participants in the Savior’s ministry and were chosen disciples in the church, you women are essential in helping fulfill the roles of the Priesthood today.

Sister Beck from the May 2011 Women's Conference: “I’ve learned through studying the history of Relief Society that we have and live with inseparable connection to the priesthood.  No one need confuse the idea of those who hold the priesthood with the gifts, blessings, and privileges associated with the priesthood.  The priesthood is God’s power.  It is His power to create, to bless, to lead, to serve as He does. The priesthood duty of every righteous man is to qualify to hold the priesthood so he can bless his family, while the priesthood duty of sisters is to create life, nurture God’s children, and prepare them to make covenants with the Lord.  Don’t confuse the power of the priesthood with the keys and offices of the priesthood.  The power is limitless and is shared with those who make and keep covenants. Too much is said and misunderstood about what brothers have and sister’s don’t. This is Satan’s way of confusing men and women so that neither understands what they really have.”

To that I have to say, the same gifts and blessings that are available for men holding the priesthood, are available for us as well.  We don’t have priesthood keys, but we have priesthood duties.  We have different roles and responsibilities and abilities from men but we are equal partners. 

As single sisters with single priesthood brethren, how do we walk side by side?

How you treat each other—respect—the way you want to be treated

Help them keep the commandments when you are with them

Don’t be afraid to discuss religious topics

As single sisters, you can be and MUST be a strength to the Priesthood holders around you in how you dress and act and live your life—don’t be a temptation—Let them know that you have high standards and expect them to have the same.

Abide by the principles in the For Strength of Youth Pamphletb

Chelsea/Cherie/Caitlin talked about several women who learned, listened and walked beside Jesus Christ when he was here on the earth.  These women were essential in His ministry.  We as women are essential in the work of salvation today.

3.  TO INCREASE IN PERSONAL HOLINESS: To be examples of righteousness and faith and strength

Esther is a perfect example of a woman who was an example of righteousness and strength and faith.  To be an example to the world, we can’t be afraid.  We have to know and understand our roles as women and act on them.   1 Timothy 4:12 . . . be thou an ^bexample of the believers, in word, in ^{cconversation}, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in ^dpurity.

What specifically can you do to be an example to others and to the world?

Live the gospel—keep the commandments—be charitable—have faith

*(Daughters in My Kingdom) Pg. 179-180  President Joseph F. Smith, the sixth President of the Church, urged Latter-day Saint women to “lead the world and to lead especially the women of the world, in everything that is praise-worthy, everything that is God-like, everything that is uplifting and that is purifying.” He said, “You are called by the voice of the Prophet of God to do it, to be uppermost, to be the greatest and the best, the purest and the most devoted to the right.”2

“You can recognize women who are grateful to be a daughter of God by their outward appearance. These women understand their stewardship over their bodies and treat them with dignity. They care for their bodies as they would a holy temple, for they understand the Lord’s teaching: “Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?” (1 Cor. 3:16). Women who love God would never abuse or deface a temple with graffiti. Nor would they throw open the doors of that holy, dedicated edifice and invite the world to look on. How even more sacred is the body, for it was not made by man. It was formed by God. We are the stewards, the keepers of the cleanliness and purity with which it came from heaven. “If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are” (1 Cor. 3:17). Grateful daughters of God guard their bodies carefully, for they know they are the wellspring of life and they reverence life. They don’t uncover their bodies to find favor with the world. They walk in modesty to be in favor with their Father in Heaven. For they know He loves them dearly.”  MARGARET D. NADAULD,  Young Women General President, The Joy of Womanhood - Ensign Nov. 2000/3

We stand for something entirely different than how the world views us.  It should be apparent by how we dress and act and present ourselves.

Women of God can never be like women of the world. The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity. MARGARET D. NADAULD,Young Women General President, The Joy of Womanhood - Ensign Nov. 2000

Each of you have beautiful characteristics differing as greatly as your looks.  I see them as I visit your wards each Sunday and hear many of your comments in your relief society lessons.  You are amazing women with fabulous abilities.  Never compare yourself to others.  Don’t put yourself down because you are not the same as other women you know.  We weren’t made to all be the same.  We help each other by having different talents.

The strength of women is needed in the Church as well as in the world.  We have to be the example for all the world to see. 

We can be stylish but modest. 

We can laugh and have fun without being crude.

We can be pure and virtuous and still be exciting. 

We can serve and be kind to others. 

We can be educated without being prideful. 

We can be mothers and leaders in our homes. 

We can have faith and be righteous.

Julie B. Beck talked about the role of women in the church

“Female identity in that plan as understood in the gospel of Jesus Christ is interesting and exciting and unique and is one of greatness and richness, choice beyond comparison.  This is also in direct contrast with the debased and devalued identity of women often portrayed in the world today, including identities based on sensuality, prestige, power, money, and leisure.  The identity we have from Heavenly Father can be fully understood only through spiritual confirmation.  An intellectual study can be made, but a spiritual confirmation teaches us who we are and what we are to do.…”

(Daughters in my Kingdom) Elder M. Russell Ballard, pg. 172 middle of 2^nd column.  Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the TwelveApostles said: “We believe in and are counting on your goodness and yourstrength, your propensity for virtue and valor, your kindness and courage,your strength and resilience. We believe in your mission as women of God. …We believe that the Church simply will not accomplish what it must withoutyour faith and faithfulness, your innate tendency to put the well-being ofothers ahead of your own, and your spiritual strength and tenacity. And webelieve that God’s plan is for you to become queens and to receive the highestblessings any woman can receive in time or eternity.”c

*Pg. 181  bottom of 2^nd column: The Lord’s promises are sure as sisters follow the counsel He gave to the firstRelief Society president: “Verily I say unto you, all those who receive mygospel are sons and daughters in my kingdom. … Lay aside the things of thisworld, and seek for the things of a better. … Cleave unto the covenants whichthou hast made.”¹⁷ When the Prophet Joseph Smith told Relief Society sistersto “live up to [their] privilege,” he combined that exhortation with a promise:“The angels cannot be restrained from being your associates. … If you will be pure, nothing can hinder.”

Give you 30 seconds to write down a specific goal that you are going to work on this semester—if you want to be more charitable, than what are you going to do?

If you want to be a better example—then what exactly will you do to show your strength?

If you want to understand your role—how are you going to accomplish that?

What do you need to do to better support the Priesthood?

Isn't awesome that our Heavenly Father loves us so much that He helps us and shows us how to become the person He knows we can become.  I love this gospel.  We are a blessed people! 

Release

So sometime in October, I was sitting in Sacrament meeting listening to the new high councilor and his wife bear their testimonies and I had an over whelming impression that it was time to be released.  Pres. Mullen had told me he didn't really want to release me after Kim was called to be the Bishop and I told him I was good with that as well.  Several people  had felt like I should be released, that it was asking too much to be the Bishop's wife and the Stake Relief Society President.  I felt fine with doing both.  But that Sunday when the feelings came so strongly, I starting to cry--just a little, after all I was in Sacrament meeting.  I talked to Pres. Heaton who just happened to be in attendance at the meeting that morning.  He told me I should talk to Pres. Mullen.  He was one that thought I should be released all along.  I went home and prayed about it and cried about it (maybe bawled a little) and then I shot an email to Pres. Mullen, who was out of town.  He responded that he would go to work on it.  We had Stake Council on the 16th and Pres. Mullen announced that it would be my last council meeting because I would be released before the next meeting. Well, when November 6th came along and time for stake council, I had not been released.  But during the meeting, in which Pres. Mullen was absent to, Pres. Mullen came in with Sister Elaine Russell and announced that she would be sustained that day as the new Stake Relief Society President.  I bore my testimony.  I met with Elaine later that day and turned everything over to her.  My heart was still yearning for that calling, but I knew it was time to let someone else have the experience.  It was hard for a couple of weeks.  I kept thinking about the different ward presidencies and missing my association with them and with my presidency.  It was an amazing two years.  I learned so much.  I think the thing I learned the most was that the spirit talks to you.  The Lord qualifies those that are called.  He does not leave you alone.  My testimony was strengthened and I know that I can receive personal revelation.  I've had experiences where I know how that feels.  I know that God loves me.  I am grateful for the chance I had to serve.  I have rubbed shoulders with some pretty amazing girls.

What's most important to you?

Bishop Roper asked me to speak in sacrament meeting on September 11, 2011.  My assignment topic was a talk given by Julie B. Beck in 2009 to institute and seminary teachers.  It was reprinted in the March 2011 Ensign and titled, Teaching the Doctrine of the Family.  It was a great talk and I did a lot of pondering on it as well as reading other talks with the same topic.  Here is the talk I gave:

This being the 10-year anniversary on the attack of the Twin Towers, I’ve been watching the many stories of this event in the last couple of days.

Last night I watched a story where Matt Lauer interviewed a 10-year old boy whose father was a fire fighter and died trying to save others.  This young boy broke down and cried.  He’d lost his father.  A man he loved and looked up to.  I realized that’s what families are.  They are mothers and fathers and children who love each other.  They support and strengthen each other.  They teach each other.  They are patient and forgiving.  Families are the fundamental units of society.  This attack on the US was an attack on families.  It tore apart hundreds of families.  I’ve seen many stories in the past two days—“My son was only 24.”  “My daughter had so much going for her.”  “My husband didn’t deserve to die.”  And on and on. 

Then I thought about our world today.  Families are also being attacked but internally by unseen forces—forces that sneak up and tear them apart emotionally. 

On September 23, 1995 Pres. Gordon B. Hinkley addressed the women of the church at the General Relief Society Broadcast.  He entitled his remarks, “Stand Strong against the Wiles of the World.”  As he concluded his remarks he said,

With so much of sophistry that is passed off as truth, with so much of deception concerning standards and values, with so much of allurement and enticement to take on the slow stain of the world, we have felt to warn and forewarn.  In furtherance of this we of the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles now issue a proclamation to the Church and to the world as a declaration and reaffirmation of standards, doctrines, and practices relative to the family, which the prophets, seers, and revelators of this church have repeatedly stated throughout its history. I now take the opportunity of reading to you this proclamation:

He then read what we know now to be “The Family: A Proclamation to the World”.  I was at the meeting.  I remember well when he said that they were issuing a proclamation to the church and to the world that I perked right up and wanted to hear what this was all about. 

As he concluded he said:

The strength of any nation is rooted within the walls of its homes. We urge our people everywhere to strengthen their families in conformity with these time-honored values.

This proclamation is still viewed as very important and is a warning to all.   The church views families as such an important unit in society that in the new handbook, the first chapter is entitled: “Families and the Church in God’s Plan”.  I love this chapter and would encourage all of you to go to the church’s web site and read this chapter.  The first two sentences say, “The family is ordained of God.  It is the most important unit in time and in eternity.”   This is God’s plan, to come to earth, gain a body, prove our worthiness to be in his presence and to keep his commandments and ultimately return to live with him again.  BUT we cannot accomplish this alone.  We need the Savior and his atonement and we need our families.  The handbook also says, “As part of our Heavenly Father’s plan, we were born into families.  He established families to bring us happiness, to help us learn correct principles in a loving atmosphere, and to prepare us for eternal life.”  It’s a training ground.  I think we could say that we cannot return to God’s presence without families.   Parents are responsible to teach their children the gospel of Jesus Christ.  The church has the responsibility to support and strengthen the family and provide the means where the gospel can be taught.  It provides the priesthood authority to perform the ordinances of salvation and exaltation.  Without the family, God’s plan does not work.  Without the family, there is no plan.

 From the Proclamation and this 1^st chapter we learn several things.  I have picked out 10 things:

            1. We are children of Heavenly Father

            2. We existed with Him as spirits before this earthly life

            3. We have earthly experiences so we can progress and become more like our Heavenly Father

            4. Marriage is between a man and a woman

            5. Marriage is an essential part of God’s plan and we can only obtain exaltation in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom when we have faithfully lived the gospel and are sealed in the temple to our companion & family.

            6. We are responsible to have children and to rear them in righteousness—to love them, to develop relationships with them, to teach them about Jesus Christ—The commandment given to Adam and Eve has not been retracted.

            7. Children have the right to be born into a family that has a mother and a father—which means they have the right to remain in a family with that same mother and father.

            8. Married couples should be completely faithful to each other, physically, mentally and emotionally.

            9. Mothers and Fathers have different roles in the family, but they must work together as equal partners to be effective.

            10. The family is the fundamental unit of society.

Sixteen years ago, the Prophet of the church was concerned about how the world views marriage and families.  Today, our leaders are still concerned.  Sister Beck said in an address given to seminary and institute teachers in 2009 and which was printed in the Ensign this past March:

Evidence is all around us that the family is becoming less important. Marriage rates are declining, the age of marriage is rising, and divorce rates are rising. Out-of-wedlock births are growing.  Abortion is rising and becoming increasingly legal.  We see lower birth rates. We see unequal relationships between men and women. . . .  Many times a career gains importance over the family.

Many of our youth are losing confidence in the institution of families. They’re placing more and more value on education and less and less importance on forming an eternal family.  Many don’t see forming families as a faith-based work.  For them, it’s a selection process much like shopping.  Many also distrust their own moral strength and the moral strength of their peers.  Because temptations are so fierce, many are not sure they can be successful in keeping covenants.

Unfortunately we are not only seeing these trends in the world, but we are also seeing them in the LDS culture.

So what does that mean to you?

This is what this should mean—

We cannot follow the trends of the world and how they view the family.  You need to learn about and support the doctrine of the family—read & study the proclamation.  Read chapter 1 in handbook 2 found on the church web site.

You need to do all you can to find a mate—how do you do that?  By dating, by getting yourself out there to meet people of the opposite sex and talking to them, by being involved in ward and stake activities, by attending church meetings, by working and going to school.

You need to keep your baptismal covenants and for those of you that have been to the temple, you need to keep the covenants made in the temple—which means you have complete sexual abstinence before marriage and are prepared to have totally fidelity once you are married.  [Keeping those covenants all your life will greatly diminish your chances of getting a divorce.]

You must always strive for family unity by repenting and forgiving each other—both in your families now and in your future families.  In the handbook it states:  “Just as sin, mortal weaknesses, emotional hurt, and anger are conditions that separate God’s children from Him, these same conditions can separate family members from each other.”  If we are a church that believes in the atonement then we must be willing to forgive our own family members—our children and our spouses.

You need to be a good home teacher and visiting teacher and participate in family home evening.  What better way to prepare yourself to teach your own children, to be prepared to strengthen them and prepare them for a righteous life and home.

You need to read from the Book of Mormon daily, say your prayers twice a day, follow the council in the for strength of youth pamphlet, have a current temple recommend and use it and act and not be acted upon.  If those don’t sound familiar then I hope it’s because your new in our stake—these are the things our stake presidency asks us to do.

Anyone who knows me well knows that my family is the most important thing in my life.  Kim and I have done our best to raise our four daughters to be obedient faithful daughters of God.  We set rules and boundaries we expected them to live by as they were growing up. We treated them with respect and expected the same in return.  We have tried to develop relationships through many activities together.  We still do things together.  We celebrate holidays and birthdays as a family.  Even though all but one are married, we still have family dinner together every Sunday.  It is the highlight of my week.  We try to have a family vacation every 3 to 4 years.  This is our year!  We are all excited and can’t wait for our Disney-World trip in November.   It is things like this that help keep our family strong.   The proclamation says, “Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”

We have got to be strong in defending families.

We have got to set the example—we have to have children & teach them and love them.

I have a testimony of the importance of the family.

We have to do all we can to have strong families.

We have to always be on the look-out for those “planes” that are sneaking up and trying to destroy our family.

Please stand up and defend the families throughout your life—and show the world your testimony of families by the way you have and treat and raise your own family. 

The Church is true. 

The doctrine of the family is the plan of happiness and salvation. 

It is through families that we can return to live with our Heavenly Father and with those we love. 

We are a blessed people. 

Our Heavenly Father loves us so much. 

Changes

Way back in May, my husband, Kim, was called to be a Bishop in the YSA 17th Stake but because of one thing and another, he wasn't sustained until Aug. 3.  He is now the Bishop of the 251st Ward.  It's very humbling for both of us.  We are amazed at the caliber of kids (men and women) in this ward.  They are great!  For the time being, I am still the Stake Relief Society President.  I have very mixed feelings about it.  I love the opportunity that I have had to serve and rub shoulders with so many amazing young women.  I don't really want to be released BUT I also want to be able to really get involved in the 251st ward and get to know all the kids.  I, for sure, will be able to be around for activities and FHE at our house and ward prayer and such.  In other wards, anything that is outside of the normal 3 hour block of Sunday Church time, I can go to.  But with ward conferences starting (next week) I'll be very busy going to other wards for the next 3 months.  That's almost the whole semester.  So I have mixed feelings.  But for now, I am staying where I am and will just have to do what I can, when I can and get to be involved with our new ward as much as I can.   So far I have been able to go visiting apartments with Kim and the Almeidas.  Gasper Almeida is Kim's first counselor.  The other counselor, Justin Weiss and his wife weren't available to go with us.  It was so fun to meet everyone on their own turf.  They were all so kind and accepting.  We had the leadership over to our home last week for dinner and FHE.  It was a great evening.  This is going to be a great calling.

BORN TO BE

In March 2011, we held a workshop similar to the one we did in March 2010.  We got to have it in the Harmon Conference Center.  It felt so official.  It was a perfect place to meet.  We had some of the same topics as last year available for the girls to learn about, and we had a few new topics:

Dating taught by Brother Justin and Sister Shannon Weiss
Decision Making taught by Bishop Kirk and Sister Kathy Benson
Presenting your Best Self by Sister Cassie Myers
Meal Planning and Healthy Lifestyles taught by Sister Sherrie Larsen
Budgets and Finances by Brother Kim Roper (my infamous husband!)
Balancing Life by Bishop Bob and Sister Celest Lott
Positive Attitudes taught by Bishop Reid and Sister Karen Heiss
Preparing to be a wife and mother taught by Sister Valerie Heaton

It was a pretty impressive outline if you do ask me!  We started in the auditorium where I was the keynote speaker and President Richard Heaton spoke for a few minutes after me.  We split up into our classes where they were able to attend two.  Afterwards we had lunch all together.  Sister Cherie Peterson and her husband, Terry, provided us with a delicious taco salad.  I think everyone enjoyed the morning.

Here is my talk:

A few months ago: My presidency and I visited each of your wards for ward conferences and I left you with 3 areas of council and 1 challenge. Who remembers the areas of council that I gave you?  (no one did :(  but one girl, Beth Yates, had her notes from ward conference and she looked them up.)

1.  Stay away from pornography and anything that resembles it.

2.  Don’t spend countless hours doing things that have no purpose.

3.  Be careful how you dress.

Challenge:

         Get rid of anything that is too low, too short or too tight.  Or at least modify it.  Don’t buy anything that fits into those 3 areas.

How are you doing?  Anyone have an experience with one of the 3 areas of council they would like to share??  [no one did!  :( ]

When I prepared for ward conferences, I felt very strongly that these were the things the Lord would have been saying to you.  This morning I felt like I needed to remind you of these things.  I feel strongly that the Lord will bless you for your efforts to follow that council.

Going along with challenge to stay away from pornography and anything that resembles it:   Pres. Monson said at a CES fireside in 2009,

"Whatever you read, listen to, or watch makes an impression on you.

Don’t be afraid to walk out of a movie, turn off a television set, or change the radio station if what’s being presented does not meet your Heavenly Father’s standards. In short, if you have any question about whether a particular movie, book, or other form of entertainment is appropriate, don’t see it, don’t read it, don’t participate."

Going along with how we spend our time:  Elder M. Russell Ballard talked a little bit about time in Nov 2010 CES Fireside:

“Are you giving the Lord equal time? You live in a world filled with technology, where there is such easy access to electronic information, entertainment, and social networks on your home computer, your iPad, or your iPhone. No generation before you has had so much technology available at their fingertips. Through Facebook and other social networks you can stay in touch with friends all over the world. While these are marvelous tools, I caution you not to let the use of technology capture your time to the point that you become addicted to constantly using them. Somehow you need to limit their use so they do not steal away from you what is essential, precious, and eternal.” 

Elder Bednar said at a CES Fireside in 2009,

 A young man or woman may waste countless hours, postpone or forfeit vocational or academic achievement, and ultimately sacrifice cherished human relationships because of mind- and spirit-numbing video and online games. As the Lord declared, “Wherefore, I give unto them a commandment … : Thou shalt not idle away thy time, neither shalt thou bury thy talent that it may not be known” (D&C 60:13).

I read several talks where this topic was mentioned.   I think our leaders are very concerned.  Since ward conferences, I personally have been very much aware of how I spend my time.  I’m also aware of my clothing and what I watch on TV and movies.

In D&C 130: 20 There is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated—21And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated.

The Lord will bless you tremendously if you will do the things He asks.

At Ward Conferences, Pres. Mullen also gave you an assignment—does anyone remember what he asked you to go home and do: 

--Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are AWESOME!!  Because each one of you are. . .

That brings me to today’s theme:  BORN TO BE! 

One of my favorite bible stories is the story of Esther. Esther was an orphan.  She was raised by her adult cousin, Mordecai.  When she was a young woman the queen of the land was dismissed, so the King was in need of a new queen.  He asked for all the available maidens to come to his palace so that he might choose a new queen.  Mordecai felt that Esther should go before the King.  She went and consequently she was chosen to be his queen.  The King loved Esther.  Unbeknownst to the King, Esther was a Jew.  The King, being advised by one of his men, issued a decree to have all the Jews killed.  When Mordecai found out, he told Esther she must go before the King and plead with him to take back the decree. Esther was frightened for the queen was not allowed to go before the King uninvited.   And that’s when Mordecai said to her:

Esther 4:14  “. . . who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”

Esther realized the great responsibility and role she had to try and save her people.  She said she would do this and then said, “and if I perish I perish.”  She than asked for all the Jews to fast and pray for her for 3 days.  She prepared a great feast for the King and then went to him and asked him to take back the decree.  He did take back the decree and her life was spared as well.

Esther had a great role in her life.  She knew that God had a plan for her and she had the faith necessary to accomplish that plan.

God has a mission for each of you sisters as well.  I would like to alter that scripture to say,

“who knoweth whether thou art born on the earth for such a time as this?”

Elder L. Tom Perry:  CES Fireside March 6

“You are the generation which the Lord has saved for this day!”

You have been told that countless times.

Many of you if not all of you have patriarchal blessings that tell you that you were foreordained to come to earth at this time.  That because of the choices you made in the pre-existence you were saved to come to earth when the gospel is here.

You have been blessed and fore ordained and endowed with special talents that are just waiting to be discovered and developed.  You are choice and noble daughters of our eternal Heavenly Father.  You have divine potential.

This is a great and exciting and wonderful time.   The world is filled with light and knowledge. There is so much available for you.  The best thing is the gospel of Jesus Christ and each of you has been given the opportunity to be a part of building the kingdom of God through His gospel.  With the gospel comes the Gift of the Holy Ghost.   And with the Gift of the Holy Ghost comes personal revelation!  Anything the Lord would like to reveal, HE can through this great power! What a great gift this is in our lives.  We also live in a time when the earth has been flooded with knowledge. I am ever so amazed at the new things that scientists and researchers are continuing to discover.

Elder M. Russell Ballard said: 

"Heavenly Father has an eternal plan for each one of you. Your birthright, the privilege you have of being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is like unto a miracle in a world of some six billion people. You made some very important promises and commitments to Heavenly Father while living with Him in the pre-mortal world."

You were Born to Be here TODAY!  To be here when the world is full of good and evil.  You were Born to Be the woman our Heavenly Father knows you can be.

You were Born to Be like our Savior, Jesus Christ.

You were Born to Be “examples of the believers, in word, in conversation, in faith . . .”

You were Born to Be someone who will make a difference in this world. 

You were Born to Be, “honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, lovely, of good report and praiseworthy”

You were Born to Be—stewards of your bodies.  We were given this physical body, to take care of it.  It is a temple of God.

Sometimes along the path of life, we may set our goals and ambitions and kind of decide what we want our lives to look like.  And we think we know exactly how it should look.  Which isn’t a bad thing as long as we are willing to let go when things don’t quite go the way we think they should.

        

Example:  When I was pregnant with our third child, a few days before she was due, I stopped feeling her move.  I became concerned and talked to a few people.  My sister-in-law who was a nurse, told me not to worry that it meant I was going to go into labor.  I tried to take her advice, but the longer it went the more I worried.  That night I remember waking up in the middle of the night and trying to get the baby to move and crying for fear that she was dead.  At that time, I begged and pleaded with Heavenly Father that he would make her live.  I knew He had the power to do that.  Jesus Christ had raised several from the dead, and if this baby was dead, He could make her live.  This was not in my plans to lose a child.  But it was in God’s plan and my baby was stillborn. I could have gone home after burying her, and curled up in my bed and spiritually and emotionally died.  But I didn’t. I didn’t loose faith. If anything it strengthened my faith.  I knew Heavenly Father loved me.  I knew that my Meggie had gone on to another phase of her life. I felt the peace that only a loving Heavenly Father can send.  I still am at peace.  I now have a granddaughter that bears her name.

We don’t always know what lies around the corner for us.  But we must trust in our Heavenly Father to know that He does know and He will never leave us alone.  He will never expect us to live this life without his help and support and guidance.  You made choices before this life that brought you here at this time.  So no matter how hard or how easy, You Were Born for a such a time as this.

You have to decide What are you going to do with your time here and with the cards you’re dealt?

In August 2008 a young mother went with her husband and his flight instructor in a small aircraft for a “day trip” from Mesa to New Mexico.  When taking off from an airport, they got tangled in some power lines and the plane caught on fire and crashed.  Stephanie Nielsen and her husband Christian survived the crash.  Christian had burns over 35% of his body.  Stephanie had burns over 83% of her body.  They had 4 young children waiting for them at home.   Stephanie was in a coma for 3 months. She spent 3 more months recovering in the AZ Burn center.  Stephanie was an avid blogger before the plane accident.  She had hundreds of followers because of her love for being a mother and wife.  She wrote about the good times and she wrote about the struggles and I think that’s why people loved her.  She was real.  After her accident, Stephanie no longer looked like Stephanie.  She, at first, didn’t feel like her old self.  Physically, she was in a lot of pain.  Eventually, with the persuasion of her family she started blogging again.  She now feels responsible to tell and share her story.  Life is still difficult Physically for Stephanie.  If any of you have seen her, you understand when she says, “I am not my body.”  

She also has said, “Some days I’m proud of this face. . . other days I think, oh man, I sure miss the old me.”  This experience has strengthened her.

She tells of an experience of while doing the laundry she went to her closet and touched all her clothing and she said she had a wave of emotion come over her.

  “I missed me again.  I mourned for that woman again. I felt that familiar sadness.  But then it was followed by a beautiful spiritual confirmation that this is my new life.  It is good.  It is OH so good.  Then I felt that I should bring home me.  Because it is still me and those clothes still fit.”

She had learned that even though she isn’t attractive to look at, and maybe some would find it difficult to look at her, she is still her.  She sees things differently and she sees life as being more than her physical appearance. She’s grateful to be on the earth.  Her role is more divine.  She is a mother who enriches and teaches the gospel of Jesus Christ and sees her life as a privilege. There is a plan for you.  It is a plan that will ultimately give you the greatest joy and happiness you will ever experience.  It can only be possible through Jesus Christ.  Stephanie Nielsen grateful for her challenges and trials.  She has a great relationship with HF. 

 “Spiritually, I have a better sense of who I am, what my divine purpose is, what I’m doing here on earth and why I’m still here.  Life has a different meaning than it did before.”

Stephanie has chosen to stand up and be an example to all women. She has chosen to have gratitude for her life.  She has learned to trust and rely on her Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.  She has chosen to try and make a difference in the lives of others.  She has chosen to not sit in her home and mope about the way she looks and feels.  She has chosen to move forward with strength and courage.  She has learned that life is not about your physical appearance, it’s about what you do with your life!  She has found her true Beauty.

Jesus Christ said, “There will I be also, for I will go before your face.  I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round you to bear you up.”  D&C  84:88

Your lives do not have to have trials and tragedies for you to grow and become the woman our Father knows you can become.  There used to be a great lady that lived in our ward.  She came to BYU right after graduating from High School.  She had great plans.  She wanted to get a college degree, serve a mission, travel the world and then marry and become a mother.  The first week she was in Provo, she met this great guy.  He was a return missionary and well on his way to getting his education.  He was ready for marriage.  She fell in love with him.  He was everything she ever wanted and dreamed of.  There was only one problem, she was NOT ready to get married.  She had plans.  Marriage was not yet in the plans for this 18 year old girl.  But she did have faith in prayer and in her Heavenly Father so she prayed for guidance as to what she should do.  'I want to travel.  I want to go on a mission.  I want to get my education.  BUT here is this great guy who wants to marry me.'  Well, she felt prompted that if she would marry him she would still be able to do all the things she had plans to do.  So she married him, and it didn’t take too long for her to see answers to her prayers.  After he graduated from  BYU he got a great job  in Italy.  This woman got to travel the world, bear her testimony and teach the gospel to non-members and she got to have a family.  Never did she dream that she could have such blessings.

Sometimes life is so amazing and sometimes life is so hard.  You don’t need a tragedy to feel of God’s love.  You don’t have to lose things that are of great value to know who we are.  You need to trust in our Heavenly Father.  You need to see your role as so divine.  You are women of God.  You have great worth.   If you will have the same attitude regardless of how life is going, to fully rely on God to guide you and direct you, and totally trust Him, then you will feel great joy and you will BE the person that He knows you can be.  

You were Born to Be Great!  

You were Born to Be educated!

You were Born to Be a mother.  

You were Born to Be beautiful.  

You were born to be you!

Remember: “There will I be also, for I will go before your face.  I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round you to bear you up.”  D&C  84:88

In the name of Jesus Christ.  AMEN!